Sunday, February 7, 2010

Sorry About Those Dishes, God

So why am I starting another blog?
Because God told me to. I know, some would say that there is no God, and that I am only writing this blog because I lack the ability to think for myself and seek the comfort of superstitious dogma.

So let's get started!

First of all, as you might have guessed, the title of this blog is from the Bible, specifically Isaiah 35:4-6, which reads:

"Say to those who are of a fearful heart,
Be strong, fear not!
Behold, your God
will come with vengeance,
with the recompense of God,
He will come and save you.

Then the eyes of the blind shall be opened,
and the ears of the deaf unstopped;
then shall the lame man leap like a hart,
and the tongue of the dumb sing for joy."

I hear the tongue of the dumb singing every day. I am proud to add my voice to the choir. The dumb choir. Yes, we is dumb and we am proud!

I promise there will be more, lots more, where this came from. I'm rushing this post a little because it's Super Sunday, and I need to remember that and keep this day holy. I know I'm not supposed to do any work today and I therefore imperiled my immortal soul when I washed those dishes. For punishment, I will allow myself to be stoned.

Ah, that's better.

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About Me

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I am the Ken doll you left outside in 1983. I have been living on cat food and squirrels, coming out mostly at night, unable to wash or even change my clothes because they are permanently sewn on. I ask you, would a merciful God allow this? I just wish I could wipe this stupid grin off my idiot face.